Friday, August 5, 2011

Half a year...

Dear Sara,

Six months.Twenty-six weeks.One hundred and eighty-two days.

That's how long it's been since the world was robbed of your smile, your laugh, your beauty, your being. Our families will never be the same, scarred by this amputation for the rest of our lives. Even with great hope, we live with great sorrow.

The paradox of time rears its ugly head. So many of those days have passed so slowly; it's impossible to fathom that it's been that long. So much of our grief feels so fresh. In other ways it feels as though what we had was a lifetime ago. It's a memory seen through the lens of history or a movie we've seen a hundred times; one where we know the lines by heart, because we spoke them, yet it feels as though someone else must have said and done those things.

We love you. I love you. We miss you. I miss you. Give Miranda a kiss from daddy.

Love,
Chad

10 comments:

  1. Chad, hard to belive it's been 6 months. When you write it's hard to fathom that it's been that long, yet it feels like a lifetime ago...yeah, I get that. My heart goes out to you. Stand firm in your faith, even when you feel you can no longer continue. You have a purpose to further the Kindgom, and minister to the grieving...in His time. :o)

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  2. It's been so long since you posted. I have frequently thought/prayed of/for you and checked here for any update. I remembered to pray for you this morning as I saw a baby about 6 months old and thought of Miranda. You inspire me so much and make me so grateful for the family I have. Your faith is a true witness to our beautiful Savior. God bless you and give you His strength to continue!

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  3. Chad, thank you for sharing your journey. You have been in my thoughts and prayers so many times since I saw the original prayer group for baby Miranda, and by the time I learned of it, she was in heaven with her mommy.. I sat at my computer and cried. I can't imagine what you've been through. I pray that God continues to give you the encouragement you need and the comfort that ONLY he can give you during these times as you go through the grieving process. In the days that followed I often had Jars of Clays "valley song" in my head... the lyric that still sticks with me today "While we wait for rescue
    With our eyes tightly shut
    Face to the ground using our hands
    To cover the fatal cut
    And though the pain is an ocean
    Tossing us around, around, around
    You have calmed greater waters
    Higher mountains have come down"
    Chad, you may not know today, or 6 years from now why God allowed you to go through this horrible tragedy that you went through, and you may not know this side of heaven. One day you will know, and you will get to hold your baby girl again and your beautiful wife, and all will be right. Keep your eyes up, and your heart open.

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  4. "You don't get over grief, you just get through it. Your don't get by it and you can't get around it. It doesn't 'get better'; it just gets different. Everyday... Grief puts on a new face...and eventually you realize that the grief looks like a memory and you find a way to smile."

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  5. I'm so sorry, there are really no words I can come up with, my heart is breaking for you. Asking God to comfort you and surround you with people who love you and will walk this journey with you...

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  6. Hi Chad,

    Many times over the last 6 months I've thought about you, but even more now that your posts have become so infrequent. Life has gone on as it always has and will. Nothing anyone says or does will make your life easier or different now. But we all care about you and want you to know that we still carry a little of your sorrow in our hearts.

    Your friend in Christ
    Rebecca

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  7. I am praying for you tonight.

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  8. I'm a little late in posting but we have been moving. Thinking about you and praying for you. Hugs from cyberspace....I can't even imagine... but I can pray!

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  9. I have checked many times to see if you have written. I have prayed that you are beginning to find a little peace. I can't believe it's been 6 months already though. 6 months since I got the email, 6 months since I started praying for little Miranda, 6 months since your life changed so drastically. I will continue to keep you and your family in my prayers.

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Thanks,
Chad